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| Adoration of the Magi (The Epiphany), Hieronymus Bosch c. 1485 - 1500 |
Close to 3 years ago, I interviewed a young man; he was a prodigy, a vanguard, the voice of his generation. Shortly thereafter, I interviewed my friend Vhol!!! If you would like to see this interview, you can click here !
Seasons change: leaves fall off trees, the ocean becomes low tide, and people also change, like when Kanye went b l o n d e. And Vhol? He probably changed too, even if he still has the exact same hideous sandals 3 years later.
So where is he now and who is he now? Read on to see the pressing questions that will again give us an invaluable insight to the man behind the Vhol circa 2017.
1. Never be able to watch cricket again, or never be able to make an Excel spreadsheet again?
I've gotta think about this one... I think... never be able to make a spreadsheet again because I could write them down in a book... like one of those maths books with all the grids. Man that's really tough though. That's ruthless. But yeah, I love cricket. Man.
2. Would you rather live 100 years in the future or 1000 years in the future?
To be honest I reckon 100 years in the future is gonna be pretty average and I don't hold much hope for 1000 years in the future either, but I kinda wanna go there to see how crazy it is, so I'd choose 1000 years.
3. Would you f*ck Hillary Clinton and why / why not?
Um... is this assuming that I'm not dating Elizabeth? [Yes]. Can you make sure you include that disclaimer? Okay... no. No i wouldn't. I don't have any desire to sleep with Hillary Clinton. I'd rather sleep with Prince Charles, ahaha! Love that guy.
4. Shoot, shag, marry: Hitler, Donald Trump, KimDotCom ?
I have to shoot Hitler out of principle. But that means I have to have sex with either Donald Trump or KimDotCom!!! ...This could be a crazy call, but maybe I'll actually marry Hitler, because as his attractive and manipulative wife I could change the course of history. Then I would shag KimDotCom and shoot Donald Trump.
6. What is one thing you would take with you to a deserted island?
Maybe a rugby ball, and then it could be like Castaway 2 and I could call him Gilbert... hahaha coz it's a rugby ball brand!! Instead of Wilson like Tom Hanks!! And I love kicking rugby balls, its super fun. And then when I get saved I could come back and be the best goal kicker in the world.
7. What is the angriest you've ever been and why / why not?
One time when I was about 7 I got really angry at my parents and I went into my room and I was so angry I tried to lift up my dressing table and I slammed my fist down on a toy car hoping that I would get super-saiyan strength. I hoped that I was going to turn super-saiyan. I was pretty mad then.
8. Have you ever considered cloning yourself and keeping the clone as a sex slave and why / why not?
I've never considered it but now I am. No, that's so disturbing, I definitely wouldn't do that. It would be cool to just have my clone around, but I wouldn't keep it as a sex slave. If we loved each other it would happen naturally.
9. What if your clone consented to being a sex slave tho ?
You read my mind!... No! Would you clone yourself and use it as a sex slave? [Yeah, maybe]. Are you writing that down? [Yes]. Do you want to clone me and use my clone as a sex slave? [No]. What's wrong with m e ??
